A Guide to Self-Love in Christ

‘If only my husband loved me more, then, I would love myself more.’ I heard a woman make this statement to her friend while I was at the coffee shop the other day. My heart ached for her as I knew her same desire in the past, to find a way to love myself.

How We Are Deceived

We all come to understand love through the messages we hear, the experiences we have, and the beliefs we formed about ourselves, love, and others. Unfortunately, we don’t know Christ’s perfect love from birth, so we all form a broken love design. We continue to adjust it and operate from it as Christians without knowing it. We’re unaware that we have the option and opportunity to learn about Christ’s exception love design and live in it.

How to Discover Christ’s Love Design

To live in Christ’s love, we must have a growing personal relationship with him every day. I’m not talking about spending five minutes a day reading the Bible or praying and treating your relationship like a check on your to-do list. Having an intimate relationship with Jesus requires you to talk with him about everything throughout your day. Thank him for all he has done for you and for his promises, which is prayer. You can also praise him whenever you are in your car or at home with praise music. It is also vital for you to study God’s word to know his heart, character, and true love.

Jesus replied, “You are in error because you do not know the Scriptures or the power of God. Matthew 22:29 NIV Unless you know God’s truth and Jesus Christ in a personal relationship, and through the word of God, you are vulnerable to the schemes and lies of the enemy. When we see Christ’s true love through his obedience, his respect, his healthy boundaries, and the fruits of the Holy Spirit, we begin to understand and to live in his perfect love design.

Christ’s Love Renews Our Mind and Fills Our Hearts

The only way to stop using our broken love design is to replace it with Christ’s. Once we accept his unconditional love for us, he begins the process of renewing our mind and heart as we study God’s word. Jesus reaches in the depths of our mind and shows us that we are loved by him as he died for you and me.

Only we can choose to receive his ultimate love and to stand on the fact that he died to show us his love. Until we decide to live like we believe and live in his love, we cannot love ourselves. To not love ourselves as we love others is to disobey the second greatest commandment. We can’t earn or prove that we are worthy of being loved, we only need to accept that we are loved unconditionally by Jesus. Because we are loved unconditionally, we can love ourselves the same way.

To live in Christ’s love, we need to hold onto the hand of Jesus and let him help us learn to live in his love inside of our hearts. There is no way you can love yourself in a perfect healthy and balanced love without Jesus. He’s just waiting to show you how to allow his love to overflow in your life and out to others. He came so you could, ‘Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ.’ Ephesians 5:2 NLT

It’s time for you to learn how to love yourself as you love others as a disciple of Christ. Let him guide you and fill you to overflowing. As a child of God, you were created from His love and designed to live in love. Let your love light shine!

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