If I’m not smarter, faster, prettier, or the top of my company, I’m a nobody. If I do more, people will like me. If I lose weight, my husband will be attracted to me again.
All of these statements use the formula “if I do this, then I get that.” They focus on your performance of earning or deserving something. This formula locks you in an unachievable cycle of trying to satisfy other imperfect people’s ideas or standards that continually change according to their desires.
Beginning of Your Identity
When you determine who you are by what you do, what others say, or how you are treated, you lose sight of the fact that you exist because “God knit you together inside your mother’s womb” (Psa. 139:13). Who you are was determined by God’s hands. Whether you choose to receive the Salvation of Christ or not, this fact remains.
As Christ’s disciples, falling into the performance mindset goes against who we are in Christ. God made us human “beings,” not human “doings” to remind us that our identity comes from whose we are, God’s creations. Although we all have to perform tasks within our responsibilities, we need to do our best. However, our responsibilities, roles, jobs, and positions are things that flow from our identity. They are not the origin and foundation of our identity.
Problems with Performance Based Identity
The challenge for many believers is that they were not taught who they are in Christ. They don’t know what that means or how they can be transformed into the likeness of Jesus to love others as he loves us. Without knowing who we are in Christ, we can only use the false identity we created from our imperfect experiences, messages, and beliefs. Unfortunately, our false identity usually follows a performance identity.
A performance-based identity warps the value we place on ourselves and others. When we’re wrapped up in how our performance makes us look or what we gain, we are living in the self-focused sin of pride. We can start to believe that who we are is based on how good or how bad we are doing something, which is not true in our Christ identity.
In a self-focused mindset, we see ourselves in two extremes. First, we see ourselves as more than others. We act entitled, arrogant, narcissistic, disrespectful, degrading, and abusive. We become highly competitive and strike out or self-destruct to deal with failure and rejection. Our disappointments can lead to sinful, destructive reactions toward others including, verbal and other abuse or destructive actions toward ourselves.
The second extreme in a performance identity sets you up to need and crave approval. When you can’t find approval, you may resort to getting good or bad attention just to be noticed. You can begin to equate approval or attention as your value or worthiness to be loved. Focusing on approval can also make you vulnerable to be lured into an unhealthy or toxic, abusive relationship. You can be caught unaware and defenseless if you don’t know the differences between healthy and unhealthy relationships or the types and signs of abuse.
As Christ’s disciple, learn who you are in Christ and walk with him every day to guard yourself against falling into these two extremes. Jesus doesn’t download us with our Christ-identity when we receive salvation. Each disciple is responsible for learning who God and Jesus are and how to serve them in love and honor. Our personal daily journey is what our faith is all about.
We Are Before We Can Do
We must exist before we can do anything. Operating from a performance identity places what you do in front of your creation. It is backward and not God’s design.
We are the handcrafted masterpieces of God. (Eph. 2:10) Our identity comes from being formed in the “image of God.” (Gen 1:27) Whenever we try and determine our identity from any other source other than who created us, it will be flawed and wrong.
To stop determining your identity by your performance, you must take the focus off of yourself. You must focus on who you are as Christ’s disciple. The only way to know who you are in Christ, is to study the life of Jesus and realize that all that he is, is now living in you.
Jesus will never force you to learn or obey his ways. God created you with the freedom to choose to work with Jesus or to do life influenced by your sinful desires, performance, and imperfect ways. You can be saved and yet never mature your faith or thrive in the abundance of Christ’s love and identity.
Living in Our Christ Identity
The apostle Paul tells us. “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what Gods’ will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” (Rom. 12:2) Although Christ’s salvation makes our spirits new, we must work with Jesus to learn how to grow our faith and live in a close relationship with him.
One of the best ways to know that our identity is matching Christ’s is to look at the fruit of our attitudes, words, and actions. The seeds of the fruits of the Holy Spirit were implanted in our spirit when we received Salvation. These fruits are love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, gentleness, kindness, faithfulness, and self-control. (Gal. 5:22-23)
As we work with Jesus, these fruits will grow and mature, and our life will show an abundant crop of these fruits. Our attitudes, words, and actions will make Jesus smile. They will bring him honor and show others Christ’s love, grace, mercy, respect, and his gospel of hope.
Dwelling with Jesus every day, we will teach us to function from our Christ-identity. We won’t worry about operating from a performance identity established by the world or our sinful flesh. What we do or don’t do won’t determine or deplete our identity as a child of God and an ambassador of Christ. Let your identity in Christ be his light to the world and shine bright as you surrender your performance identity!
Learn who you are in Christ and how to live in his identity in the online course Who Are You?
Find encouragement and support for the challenges you face every day. Join my private Facebook group Growing Through God’s Transforming Grace.
