If we are not taught what it means to follow Jesus, we often assume that Jesus will instantly tell us what to say and do to love like him. However, our assumptions are what leads to confusion, frustration, doubts about our faith, and even our salvation. In other words, we want to be a “good Christian,” but we are still acting like the selfish sin-focused world. Our wanting and wishing doesn’t change what we say and how we act. Only working with Jesus Christ every day transforms our hearts, minds, words, and actions into his likeness.
The Gospel of Jesus Christ and the truth of God show us Christ’s love that is beyond anything we can imagine. As his disciples, we can thrive in his love, even in the challenges of our lives. I would not have overcome three abusive marriages and divorces without Jesus. I would still be imprisoned in the cycle of domestic abuse.
2020 has taught us that we can only control our mindset, attitudes, beliefs, words, and personal actions. We have also realized that some natural destructive realities of living in a broken world can affect every aspect of our lives. However, as disciples of Christ, we must know and learn how to let Jesus use the challenges we face to show us his love, teach us, and strengthen our faith.
We can only love others and let them love us from the love design we know. We can only do what we know until we learn and do something different.
When we operate from our broken love design, we can believe these lies and allow others to disrespect, hurt, manipulate, or abuse us. Victims of abuse need to know these verses are a picture of the love we give and receive. Christ’s love NEVER includes abuse.
To have an exceptionally happy marriage, you must partner with Jesus to replace your broken love design with Christ’s exceptional love design. Unless Christ’s love design is the origination, foundation, and compass for your individual love and marriage, you will continue to use hurtful words and unloving attitudes. You and your spouse will continually fight and be frustrated. You will be vulnerable to fall into the cycle of domestic abuse and to pass the devastating behaviors of abuse onto your children.
Although you can’t instantly wipe your broken love design clean like the memory in a corrupted computer, you can choose a new code for your broken love design to follow.
The people in our congregations, Christ’s people, are hurting and confused. They don’t know where to find help to understand how Christ’s design of love is different than theirs.